Iโve shared that one inspiration for the name of this site is based on a Finnish mindset called Sisu and part of that is managing the stress in your life.
In America, and likely other first-world countries, it feels that stress is actually part of our culture. Biologically, we have seen evidence to prove that stress and trauma can be genetically transferred from mother to child so it stands to reason that our stress is actually a part of us. Trying to uncoil generational, economical and social stress is a huge task to take on. Weโve seen in studies that our bodies react to stress chemically and that it can alter our DNA, mutating our genes and allowing free radicals to move through our cells causing cancer, hypertension and anxiety. To cope with stress we eat, drink, smoke and gravitate toward people who are as low energy as we are.
Now, anyone with an Instagram is getting daily offers to purchase a way to detox and get healthier, but healthy starts in the head.
If it feels like your peers will think you arenโt doing enough if you arenโt complaining about being busy, Iโm here to tell you that you are doing plenty. Courtney Carver in the book Soulful Simplicity: How Living with Less Can Lead to So Much More says, โAfter a while, I wasn’t saying no because I was so busy, I was saying no because I didn’t want to be so busy anymore.โ
I got to that place in 2022 when I was sitting in traffic for an hour and a half with my 3 year old in the backseat to get to my job in the Hamptons everyday. I would do everything I could with him in the car to keep him occupied and distracted. We would sing, play I Spy, talk about what we were going to do the next time I had a day off and the whole time I would think about how this is the quality time I had with him. It made me sad to think that being strapped into a car was how I was connecting with my child. I wanted more out of my life and more for his. It took six months, but I finally scored a work from home job that allowed us to spend longer mornings together and shorter trips in the car to a daycare that was closer to home.
Since I started working at 14 years old cleaning tables at my dadโs restaurant, I have been running from place to place. I had been literally running through my life- to school, to work, home to clean, finding or making my next meal. At 34 years old I felt like I was 64. I was exhausted mentally, emotionally and physically and something needed to change.
Naturally, my daily routine changed when I was working from home and I made a list of the things I wanted to do then made a schedule for how I was going to work them into my daily life. I cut down the things I didnโt really need to do or could do with my son on the weekends, such as trips to make returns and I accepted the delivery fee for having my groceries delivered to me instead of spending hours at the store to save $10 that I would probably spend in gas and the Starbucks coffee I would inevitably buy for doing such great work at the grocery store.
Try making a list of things you need to do and things that are secondary. What I learned was that I didnโt really need to do everything in one day. We have 5 five days in a work week, so I fit in 1-2 things that needed to get done and 1 thing that could get done. I found that I was more productive during the week when I gave myself the okay to sit for 15 minutes a day and do nothing. I bought colored pencils and a coloring book and for 15 minutes a day I sat and colored. I also worked on meditation and sat in silence. I used the 15 minutes a day to do anything I wanted. It has never been the same thing, but it always is a time I look forward to. Itโs also never the same time every day. I look at my schedule for the day and in between meetings and appointments that come up, I work in that 15 minutes. I encourage you to find your 15 minutes every day.
Stress relief can come in many forms: physical movement, singing, playing games, reading. Find something that makes you smile and then do it because you are worth it. We may have to work to pay our bills, but we donโt have to be stressed out 24/7. The choice to work toward a life of living for you and doing the things that makes you happy starts in your mind when you make the choice to find a way to be free of brain clutter, anxiety and fear. This is a long and hard road but I can do it and you can do it.
In the book Inner Engineering: A Yogiโs Guide to Joy, Sadhguru explains that we all have stress, it is a part of life, we need to learn to overcome the feeling of stress.
Inhale, exhale, repeat.